A formula that works

Jennifer Tilly, wow.

You know, I think it's the annoying voice that really puts me over the top for this girl. She's old enough to be my um, sister, but wowiee. I saw an old interview she did on the Jon Stewart show and I remembered how much I dig looking at her. And she's charming too. And she doesn't really mind getting naked.

So whats going on in the world today...

Bush signs bill to build border fence to stop Mexicans

Get real. There will be no fence. You may not realize this, but more than a few Mexicans own wire-cutters, rendering a fence quite useless, I'm afraid. The gummint will use whatever money they get from this to pay off some Texas business interests, build a "virtual fence" and declare victory. Why bother? where would we be without Mexicans? We would have no Cinco de Mayo, no cheap mexican restaurants and no low riders. America would be a lot less colorful. Come on over, Mexicans, just do me a favor and stop taking such low wages, it makes it a little rough for the rest of us. Solidarity brothers! I have more in common with the average "illegal alien" (or whatever we're calling them now) than with the ruling classes of either country. Lets work together, shall we?

For now, modest sanctions eyed for Iran

For later, Israeli airstrike in the offing.

I once had to dumb down a newsletter headline at work that used the phrase "in the offing" because my boss didn't know what it meant.

On top of that, she was niggardly with my salary.

NJ gay marriage decision boost to "values voters"

Values?

I presided at a gay wedding ceremony last summer. Unfortunately, the state of Ohio did not recognize the union. The two men are still quite happy together, but since they're not legally married, they run into little problems like not being able to buy a house together, or share insurance, or visit each other at the hospital. I don't think it would hurt our country too much to give them the same consideration other married couples get, would it?


‘I believed Madonna would bring my son back’

I don't care how rich you are, you're not allowed to buy them anymore!

screw it, here's another hottie

I wrote another post about Iran, Syria, Israel, and what's about to happen, but you don't want that now do you? So here's a nice picture to look at and isn't she nice. She can call my hometown Shitsburg, shit city, whatever you want babe.

Are you watching Lost? cuz I'm not. - in fact, I haven't had television since May. I mean we have a TV, and a DVD player, and a seemingly endless supply of Elmo videos, but no actual tv. Sometimes I try to piece together the Daily Show or the Colbert Report on you tube, and usually once a day I watch Keith Olberman go off on the president. I don't know how he stays so consistently eloquent and nasty day after day. But it's good fun.

OH YEAH, don't forget Lonelygirl15... Damn that show is good. but they only give you a 3 minute episode every couple of days. But I think Bree is going to turn in Daniel to the cult and they're going to cut his wanger off or something.

So it turns out nobody knows if Britney's baby is a boy or a girl. I am going to be honest now, Britney is no longer hot enough for me to care. If you care, you're probably just gloating. Its like seeing the cheerleader in high school who was so f-ing hot that she wouldn't even speak to you, and finding out that she's living in a trailer with her 6 kids from 5 different daddies.

A picture of some random hottie

So I go to google and type in celebrity hottie, and this is the first hit. You know, Lindsay is pretty easy on the eyes, and I don't care if she only has like 8 million dollars and lives in a hotel room. I like her anyway, even though she's so poor.

I thought it would be nice to have something pleasant to look at here at JC reads the news for a change.

Dream memories

Now for something not very news-related. Dreams. I know nobody wants to hear my boring dreams so I'm not going to go into them, but there's one thing...

Sometimes in dreams I remember things that didn't happen. But I remember them as if my dream self really experienced them. The other day, I was dreaming that I was talking with a friend about a nice trip we had to the Azores, and I remembered every detail of the trip, the fact that we had to speak French most of the time, The white-haired waiter at the cafe, everything.

Here's the deal, I have never been to the Azores, and I don't know if they have cafes there or if they speak French. But when I woke up, it took some serious concentration to decide that I'd never really been to that place I remembered so vividly.

I want you to tell me if this kind of thing happens to you. This means you too, lurkers. I know you're out there, I watch my traffic reports babe.