Right and Wrong
Today, I read in SFGate an article of interest, I believe there is a lesson to be learned here, a less on about morality and belief. It is a sad story, and there are no happy endings ahead. A young person was murdered. Her name was Gwen Araujo, she was beaten with a frying pan, strangled, and buried in El Dorado National Forest. She died on October 3, 2003. Her killer, Jose Merel, is on trial now for the second time, his first trial ending in a mistrial, the jury unable to reach a verdict.
It's not that there is any doubt that Jose killed Gwen. He admits it. In fact, he had help. Gwen was killed at a party, and it seems that nobody there tried to save her, instead, they pinned her to the wall where she was beaten to death.
Gwen Araujo was 17, and by all accounts a very attractive young woman. In fact, Jose Merel, who is now 25, had previously had sex with Gwen. He must have found her attractive, but Gwen Araujo didn't tell Jose something. She had misled him, Gwen had a penis. Gwen was able to hide this fact during their sexual encounter, but a woman at the party told him Gwen had male genetalia.
Jose Merel had this to say in his defense:
This is where belief comes in.
Gwen Araujo believed she was a woman.
Jose believed he had sex with a man and enjoyed it.
Jose, and from the looks of it, everyone else at the party, believed the only way to regain his honor was to kill Gwen Araujo. This is a kind of morality, primitive, no doubt, but it is a morality.
At least one juror in his previous trial must have believed the murder was justified, perhaps he could relate to Jose, walk in his shoes for a moment, and honestly say he would do the same.
What Gwen Araujo did was dishonest. In a perfect world, nobody should lie to someone for sex.
Do you think Jose Merel might have, once in his life, lied to someone in an effort to have sex with her?
Gwen's dishonesty wasn't the issue that disgusted Jose. It was facing up to the fact that he had sex with a man, because Jose Merel was unable to believe that Gwen Araujo was a woman. To Jose Merel, and apparently a fair percentage of the population, it is a penis that makes a man. This is a terribly shallow definition of manhood, but I don't have an alternative, except to say that having a penis is a component of manhood, but not a necessary one.
Gwen and Jose had incompatible beliefs. Nobody at that party seemed to care that Gwen Araujo died. Was she less of a human because she believed something nobody else did? She was wrong to decieve, and she would regret it, had she been given the chance.
Jose's action is not justified by her dishonesty. His action is not justified because Gwen Araujo was anatomically different from other women. Jose's action is unjustifiable. I have heard other men, often men who believe themselves to be good men, say they would do the same. I can't understand the dread these men have. If I had sex with a woman, and later found she had a penis, I wouldn't think I was gay, and I don't feel like I'd have to prove that to anyone, certainly not by murdering a poor confused 17 year old.
I would most likely take a ribbing from my friends, my wife would have a good laugh at my expense, and I would resolve to take a good look at the goods next time. I do understand that many men don't live in that world, they would be struck to the core. I have also been struck to the core, on several occasions, and I grew from them. I grew, and nobody died. I am not pointing this out to show you how great I am, just to say that an ordinary man like me can face his deepest fears and not only survive, but grow from the experience.
Imagine it's 50 years ago, and instead of this situation, a woman with a "passing complexion" had sex with an upright male citizen of the old south, who then discovered her "secret" and killed her. How are these "good men" who I know different from the "good men" of the old south? Surely the disgust the latter felt for black people is similar to the disgust the former have for gay men. Both are culturally reinforced beliefs that create a class of humans who that it's ok to hate.
What is the lesson then? Perhaps that belief, even a belief shared by almost everybody, can lead us down a tragic path. Perhaps we all have to look at the things that frighten and disgust us most. I like to say that nobody goes crazy from facing his fears. Its running away from them that gets you.
It's not that there is any doubt that Jose killed Gwen. He admits it. In fact, he had help. Gwen was killed at a party, and it seems that nobody there tried to save her, instead, they pinned her to the wall where she was beaten to death.
Gwen Araujo was 17, and by all accounts a very attractive young woman. In fact, Jose Merel, who is now 25, had previously had sex with Gwen. He must have found her attractive, but Gwen Araujo didn't tell Jose something. She had misled him, Gwen had a penis. Gwen was able to hide this fact during their sexual encounter, but a woman at the party told him Gwen had male genetalia.
Jose Merel had this to say in his defense:
"It's hard to explain," Merel said in a Hayward courtroom of the way he felt on Oct. 3, 2003. "Your whole life you think you're a heterosexual. Then you get pleasure from a homosexual. It disgusted me."
This is where belief comes in.
Gwen Araujo believed she was a woman.
Jose believed he had sex with a man and enjoyed it.
Jose, and from the looks of it, everyone else at the party, believed the only way to regain his honor was to kill Gwen Araujo. This is a kind of morality, primitive, no doubt, but it is a morality.
At least one juror in his previous trial must have believed the murder was justified, perhaps he could relate to Jose, walk in his shoes for a moment, and honestly say he would do the same.
What Gwen Araujo did was dishonest. In a perfect world, nobody should lie to someone for sex.
Do you think Jose Merel might have, once in his life, lied to someone in an effort to have sex with her?
Gwen's dishonesty wasn't the issue that disgusted Jose. It was facing up to the fact that he had sex with a man, because Jose Merel was unable to believe that Gwen Araujo was a woman. To Jose Merel, and apparently a fair percentage of the population, it is a penis that makes a man. This is a terribly shallow definition of manhood, but I don't have an alternative, except to say that having a penis is a component of manhood, but not a necessary one.
Gwen and Jose had incompatible beliefs. Nobody at that party seemed to care that Gwen Araujo died. Was she less of a human because she believed something nobody else did? She was wrong to decieve, and she would regret it, had she been given the chance.
Jose's action is not justified by her dishonesty. His action is not justified because Gwen Araujo was anatomically different from other women. Jose's action is unjustifiable. I have heard other men, often men who believe themselves to be good men, say they would do the same. I can't understand the dread these men have. If I had sex with a woman, and later found she had a penis, I wouldn't think I was gay, and I don't feel like I'd have to prove that to anyone, certainly not by murdering a poor confused 17 year old.
I would most likely take a ribbing from my friends, my wife would have a good laugh at my expense, and I would resolve to take a good look at the goods next time. I do understand that many men don't live in that world, they would be struck to the core. I have also been struck to the core, on several occasions, and I grew from them. I grew, and nobody died. I am not pointing this out to show you how great I am, just to say that an ordinary man like me can face his deepest fears and not only survive, but grow from the experience.
Imagine it's 50 years ago, and instead of this situation, a woman with a "passing complexion" had sex with an upright male citizen of the old south, who then discovered her "secret" and killed her. How are these "good men" who I know different from the "good men" of the old south? Surely the disgust the latter felt for black people is similar to the disgust the former have for gay men. Both are culturally reinforced beliefs that create a class of humans who that it's ok to hate.
What is the lesson then? Perhaps that belief, even a belief shared by almost everybody, can lead us down a tragic path. Perhaps we all have to look at the things that frighten and disgust us most. I like to say that nobody goes crazy from facing his fears. Its running away from them that gets you.
posted by JC at 9:55 PM
1 Comments:
BRAVO...BRAVO..
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