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Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Rod Parsley

I have to preface today's rant by saying without qualification that I abhor Rod Parsley. Rod Parsley is offensive to me. If you don't know who he is, find out so you can hate him too. I think he is about as holy as a pile of dog shit. He takes money, says he's giving it to the poor or some other such thing and uses it to buy cars and houses for himself and his family. He's a liar, a thief and a con-man.

I first learned about "pastor rod" when I moved to Ohio, and took a job at a newspaper here. Parsley's church, known locally as "the mothership," is right in the middle of my territory, and I began to hear about the world harvest church and its preacher, a real con-man who "encourages" his flock to "tithe" up to 15% of their income to his church.

Parsley lives on a very nice spread in Pickerington, it has a huge pond, three house-sized buildings, and a very nice swimming pool. On the subject of his house(s), Rod and James (Rod's Dad) beat up a guy over some painting work done at his house in 1991. According to the Columbus Monthly magazine from May 1993,
In a civil suit filed in Fairfield County Common Pleas Court, a former church member named Lewis Bungard claims that in September 1991, Rod Parsley choked him and James Parsley punched him in a dispute over some painting work Bungard had done at the Parsleys’ homes. (Criminal assault charges were dropped against Rod Parsley, and his father pleaded no contest to an assault charge, was found guilty of disorderly conduct and fined $100 plus court costs.) Bungard also charges that a $7000 donation he made to the church to build a home for unwed mothers and a senior care center was used ‘for the enrichment of Rodney Parsley, his parents and others so as to achieve an opulent lifestyle for themselves.

Today, I was getting angry about this charlatan visiting hurricane victims, passing out water, water that was brought by the RED FUCKING CROSS, in a self-aggrandizing photo-op. Never mind for a minute that thousands of people are dead and he's out there defending the guy who could have saved a good number of them if he wasn't an incompetent baffoon. Using the victims of catastrophe for a photo opportunity is tasteless.

Anyway, I was getting mad about that and I see that good ol' pastor rod has declared war on the "radical homosexual agenda" that he, and good christians everywhere will no longer be silent while "radical homosexual activists attempt to force their lifestyle on the rest of America."

First off, Rod Parsley has never been silent on this or any other issue, the guy beat up his painter! Imagine that conversation - "Listen asshole, I said Navajo White, this is fucking egshell! Grab him dad!"

And the homosexuals are trying to force their lifestyle on us?

Really?

Will it just be oral or do we have to go all the way?

Can I be on top?

Can we watch the girls doing it?

4 Comments:

Blogger Unknown said...

Watch it... With talk like that you might become "a gay" and be thrust into hell...you know...with all the lesbians...Wait, can I come? *evil laugh*. I love lesbians...

Thu Sep 08, 05:25:00 PM EDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well today at GLBT Training Camp we got our "list" of people to convert. Too bad my list didn't contain Rod. However, while moving into my new apartment and working the back yard I heard a voice call out to me. "Hey you Fag, you queer, I know you are a cock sucker", it's so nice when white trash rednecks can share their thought while hiding in their house.

Sun Sep 11, 07:52:00 PM EDT  
Blogger Jacquie Fuller said...

My mom told me I needed to go to church and find God, so I found a Lutheran church down the block which proudly displayed a rainbow flag. I love Minnesota!

Mon Sep 12, 03:36:00 PM EDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I don't think that's what your mother had in mind, Bridezilla. You go find yourself a good church with a real preacher who doesnt tolerate the sodomites or the adulterators.

Sun Sep 18, 09:48:00 PM EDT  

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